"The erotic is a measure between the beginnings of our sense of self and the chaos of our strongest feelings." – Audre Lorde

If you’re like me, you might have been taught - directly or indirectly - to see pleasure as something external, something we must earn, something grand, something reserved for later.

But what if pleasure was an everyday practice? What if, instead of being a reward, it was a way of living?

This was the heart of my conversation with Crystle Johnson on We Ain’t Dying For This podcast, where I explored Pleasure as Liberation and reflected on how reclaiming pleasure has reshaped my identity, my work, and my sense of self.

Who Is Marisha?

I used to define myself by what I did—my titles, my achievements, the roles I played for others. But I am unlearning that.

I am a truthteller, a visionary, a human doing my best to milk the experience we call life. I am chronically thoughtful, deeply intentional, and endlessly curious about how we can craft spaces that honor the unseen, the mystery within ourselves and each other.

If I must give myself a title, I am an educator turned experience designer and storyteller. But beyond that, I am someone experimenting with artistic expression - written, sonic, aromatic, and visual - to disentangle myself from societal expectations and fully embrace my inherent identity as a creator.

I am audacious. I am unconventional. And I am in the midst of a love affair with pleasure, not as indulgence, but as liberation.

The Lies We Tell Ourselves About Pleasure

Too many of us have been fed myths that keep us disconnected from pleasure. Here are a few:

We don’t have time for pleasure.

The truth? We don’t have time not to prioritize pleasure. When we push it aside, we push aside the very energy that sustains us.
Instead of thinking of pleasure as something that requires extra time, what if we wove it into the lives we’re already living?

We must grind, struggle, or accomplish before we can enjoy pleasure.

Society has conditioned us to believe that suffering earns us the right to rest. But pleasure is not a reward—it is a necessity.
What if we stopped delaying joy and allowed ourselves to experience it in real-time?

Pleasure must come from outside of us—a lover, an experience, a destination.

Pleasure is not something we wait to be given; it is something we cultivate.
When we reclaim pleasure as an internal resource, we stop outsourcing our joy and begin accessing it at will.

Pleasure is always sexual.

While erotic energy is powerful, pleasure extends far beyond the bedroom.
It is the warmth of the sun on your skin, the rhythm of a song that moves you, the deep exhale of a moment fully lived.

Pleasure must be extravagant to be real.

True pleasure is often found in the simplest moments.
The scent of a favorite candle. The sound of laughter. The texture of a soft fabric.

New Truths to Embrace

Pleasure is a practice, not a reward.
Pleasure is fuel, not a distraction.
Pleasure is power, when we claim it, we reclaim ourselves.

How Pleasure Transformed My Life

Photo Credit: Shereen Jenkins x Ms. Marisha

Before my ‘Purposefully Pursuing Pleasure’ era, I was a high achiever, always striving, always proving. As the firstborn, the first in my family to go to college, a collegiate athlete, I measured my worth in success, in service, in sacrifice.

I lived for external validation. I sought control. I avoided vulnerability.

But something was missing.

When I started prioritizing pleasure, my world expanded. My senses sharpened. My emotions became clearer. I began experiencing life in a way I had never allowed myself to before.

I realized there was more to self-care than just pushing my body to be strong. Pleasure taught me softness, intimacy with myself, connection with others, the ability to be deeply present in the textures, sounds, and scents that soothed my soul.

Pleasure, in many ways, was my liberation. It helped me articulate my needs, honor my desires, and trust my inner wisdom, even when it led me into unknown territory.

And now, in this chapter of my life, I am not just embracing pleasure for myself, I am creating spaces where others can do the same.

A Treasure Chest Inventory: Reclaiming Pleasure

For those struggling to feel deserving of pleasure, I offer this:

Imagine yourself as a treasure chest. Within you are all the beliefs, values, and narratives you’ve collected over time. Some are precious. Others? Burdensome.

Take inventory:

What stories about pleasure are you carrying?
Who placed them there?
Which ones still serve you? Which ones don’t?

Through this practice of non-judgmental reflection, we begin to reclaim pleasure on our terms.

Why Pleasure-Centered Experiences Matter Now More Than Ever

This journey is why I am designing ‘Unwind’ which is a multi-sensory, pop up series of immersive, pleasure-centered enrichment experiences.

Each activation will be tailored to its city’s unique cultural, artistic, and wellness landscape while aligning with the vision of restoration, self-discovery, and connection. Through guided sensory explorations, storytelling, and more, Unwind invites us to slow down, reconnect with ourselves, meet new people, and rewrite our narratives around pleasure as a lifestyle.

These spaces matter now more than ever because in our world of rapid change, emerging technologies, and societal shifts, one thing remains true: our ability to access pleasure shapes our ability to lead, create, and innovate.

Self-Guided Exercise: Welcome Pleasure In

If pleasure feels foreign to you, start here:

Define what pleasure means to you. What sensations, emotions, people, places, and practices bring you pleasure?
Create a Pleasure List. Write down experiences that evoke pleasure, or ones you’ve been curious about but never explored.
Set Pleasure Dates. Commit to engaging in these experiences more often. Whether solo or with others, prioritize them.
Form a Pleasure Accountability Community. Surround yourself with people who encourage pleasure, rest, and authenticity.

Closing: A Reflection on Pleasure as Power

Photo Credit: @Goddusrising x Ms. Marisha

Pleasure is not a luxury. It is a homecoming.

Audre Lorde reminds us that "the erotic is the nurturer and nursemaid of all our deepest knowledge." When we embrace pleasure, we embrace our deepest selves.

So, I’ll leave you with this:

What would your life look like if you stopped waiting for pleasure and started welcoming it?

Pleasure as Liberation (Part 2): Channeling My Inner Audre